Groan Up

Do you remember anxiously awaiting turning 18 years old? Quickly declaring that you are finally an "adult," and you can do whatever you want? When, really, as an 18 year old the only thing that truly changes for you is your "bills" are finally your bills, you can get a scratch ticket, play the powerball, and maybe grab some smokes if you're up for it. After I turned 18, my friends and I went to hookah lounges all the time. It was the cool thing to do because we could. "Oh, hey guys! We're going to the hookah place off of 120th around 9:30 tonight... Oh, you're only 17? Ouch... That sucks."

Then, after the excitement of 18 wears off, you realize you actually aren't an adult because you can't drink at bars. Then the tension grows and you can't wait until you finally go the the DMV on the day of your birth, change that license and you finally go to the bar with all of your other legal friends and you are on top of the WORLD! You and all of your other friends go out every night, drink way too much, make out with way too many random people, you have embarrassing moments and black outs. Then you have one bad hangover, declare you're never drinking again. And then you start all over again the next day.

It's like If You Give A Mouse A Cookie, he just wants more and more! Just as our own human instinct to want to take things to the next level and move on to the next stage. So now, at 23, after all of my previous excitement has worn off, I'm stuck wondering: At what point do you, as an adult, really become an adult? I've heard mixed messages, from grand things that lead to change (or normalcy) in your life-- to small and minuscule things that make up your every day life. Yesterday, I had a friend tell me it is when you go furniture shopping for your own place. I've had some say when your school loans are paid off. I've had others tell me it's when you become a parent. While thinking about this, so many thoughts crossed my mind:

• Do you become an adult when you use phrases like, "For pete's sake"?
• Is it when we decide running marathons, 10ks and mud runs are actually fun? And then pay money to do it? 
• Is it when we start discussing 401k's and salary raises, and being pissed about our Christmas bonuses?
• Is it when you think of Christmas and think, "Damn, looks like I need to start saving for all the gifts I have to buy," and consider the holiday as more of a chore than anything else?
• Is it when a Spice Girls song comes on and younger people have no idea who they are? Then you die inside?
• Or when, more times than not, after a night of drinking, you crawl out of bed to move to the couch like the girl from the Grudge... Then remain there the rest of the day? 

.... I'm going with all of the above. I felt like a true adult the other day when I passed up the gossip magazine to read National Geographic and had a salad for lunch because it's "healthier," so maybe my idea is a bit off but it sure as hell felt adult! And now I'm in a perpetual state of excitement and disappointment at the same time. Gone are the days of actually staying out as long as I want at night because I have no true obligation the next day. Forever gone is the knowledge of logging on to Facebook I won't see someones child, engagement ring or nauseating wedding photos (I'm happy for you guys, really!). Adios to throwing my savings away on a impromptu trip to Europe. Auf Wiedersehen to it being acceptable that I say, "But officer, I didn't know..."

But with every closed book is a sequel. Maybe not every book, but like, the Hunger Games sequels were awesome. I guess I need a better metaphor. I guess maybe just "on to another chapter" should suffice... Now I'm an adult. Now I discuss the stock market and politics with my Grandfather when he calls. Bleh! Now I only drink half a bottle of vodka on a Saturday. And try my best to watch what I eat, and exercise every day. Now I do my laundry at least once a week AND separate by colors.

....... Despite when you become an adult, and when you actually realize you are one, my fingers are crossed for you and for me. Here's to not being the adult we all dread, individually, turning into. Whomever that may be. And becoming the awesome one that you hope you will morph into eventually. My hope is turning into the old ladies I saw last week at a club, eating shrimp skewers and drinking waaaaay too many margaritas. Judge me if you want, but you know it's awesome.